Sure, you can close the bedroom door.

But if my sexual connection with my significant other this morning had been a bummer…

…I would carry that energy with me all day. It would color every interaction I have.

The energy of the most private events of your private life ripples outward and affects everything you do, like the ripples of a rock thrown into a pond.

Those of us who want to make a difference in the world would do better by living integrated lives, rather segregating -or sometimes denying- parts of ourselves.

In my workplace trainings or with my coaching clients, I don’t mind working on communication issues in intimate relationships if that is what is alive for them at that moment — what, if dealt with, would take the biggest load off their mind. After all, the skills transfer to most interpersonal situations – including workplace, teamwork, and leadership settings .

So work on yourself, work on your relationships, bring your blind spots and your shadows into the light — and from there, let it rip. But don’t be fooled into thinking that what you do behind closed doors has no effect.

That’s why my late mentor, Joe Dominguez, used to say: “sex is the least private act.”

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